Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Liberation

Then

“What if I can’t?” I asked with bated breath.
“You have to.” Jared murmured fiercely.
“Why’s that?”
“Because, Melinda, I said so.”

I rolled my eyes at his statement and snorted out a gruff laugh as I slid the last piece of steak into my mouth. We sat in silence for the remaining portion of dinner. I could not force myself to look at him, let alone speak to him. I placed a soft gentle hand on my abdomen. I could not feel anything yet, it was too early for that, but I knew my baby lay inside me, forming.

“Jared, couldn’t we keep it?” I asked, as I got to my feet and picked up the dishes from the table. “It’s just a baby, nothing horrible.”

His hand whacked against my cheek as I reentered the dining room. Pain sliced through my jaw and up my temple as I fell hard against the wooden floor. My eyes watered but I refused to let him see me cry anymore. All day I had been wondering how to tell him, hoping he would not be mad but I guess that was a lost cause now. I was speechless but I had enough strength to pull myself up. How could he hit me when all I wanted to do was keep the child we had made together?

“I told you Melinda, I don’t want kids so you better get rid of it or I’ll get rid of you.” Jared said as he stormed out of the room.

For years, I had put up with abuse from Jared but now I was different. I fought for a little piece of me that had yet to see the light of day – I fought for my unborn child to live. With my decision made, I waited.

Now:

The rain came down in sheets, pelting the ground in a violent undulation that made me shiver with cold. How many times did I look up and down the street, hoping I would never see his face? Maybe it was something that I never would be able to stop myself from doing. Hell, it made me feel safe. Therefore, I checked the tree-lined street once more before I raced across in the pounding rain to the building and swung open the doors in a frenzy.

There I watched her, my daughter Nina. Such a beauty from her blond curls to her high kicks and swings. She was great at martial arts and I made sure of that. At 13, she had Jared’s nose and eyes, much kinder eyes of course but the same color blue. She had no idea who her father was and I was content with that. I allowed her to grow up unfettered without the strict hand of tyranny. Freedom that allowed her to become a wonderful young woman without having to answer to a man that wanted her dead before she even had a chance to live.

Monday, September 26, 2011

And the week begins

For quite sometime, as many of you, I've dreaded Sunday b/c they all lead to the inevitable Monday.  However, after being unemployed and going without food some days or asking friends for loans - I've now decided that I am just happy being alive.  My life used to consist of so many extraneous things that I can no longer afford but I'm better for it.

Ask yourselves what could you live without? What would you die if you lost?  The answers may surprise you! 

Friday, September 23, 2011

My legs boss - my legs

Well, I've seem to have been woken up by severe leg cramps. Yes, ouch!  I sprang up out of bed and hobbled around for a moment wishing the pain would soon stop.  Luckily my legs obliged but now the muscles are fluttering not fully contracting but this so annoying that I can't sleep.  Just like any of you that is up past their bedtime, against their will, I ask - NOW WHAT?  lol

It's about time...

Okay, so maybe when I began this blog I should have started writing in it then but better late then never, right?  (c :

So, I'm a writer and have been working on my first novel for quite sometime now.  I am almost there and very excited about finishing it.  I've wondered though if it never gets published will I continue to write?  And the answer is a resounding, YES!  I've come to realize that I do not put stories together for anyone else but myself.  To have the ability to place my imaginings to paper in literary prose is my way of being an artist.  Some use canvas, some use clay - I use paper and pen... err, fingers and a computer (See, the latter sounds better). 

If anyone is out there who wants to see a little bit of my life and how I write... Stay tuned!

To be continued...